We’ve all been guilty of comparing ourselves to high-level fashion influencers on Instagram or the models we see in ads for our favorite stores.  Their outfits always look so polished and put-together, even if they’re going for a casual look.

Well, you may wish you had a personal stylist every morning, but if you learn what your personal style is, you won’t need one!  You can recreate all those iconic looks you see on social media, but with your own unique style touches that make it yours! 

Now, in order to perfect your personal style, the most important thing is to be in tune with yourself.  After all, what is style if not an outward expression of who you are?

This process may seem time-consuming at the outset, but it will save you so much time (and money) down the line.  You’ll be able to identify what you like and how to make the latest trends work specifically for you!

What are you comfortable in?

First things first, you’ve got to look inward before you tailor your style outward!  Finding your baseline is always a great place to start when it comes to defining your personal style.  What types of clothes do you tend to drift towards first when browsing in stores or online?  What are your go-to outfits? 

Look through your closet and figure out which pieces you wear most often, and which pieces you haven’t touched in months — if not years!

Next, let’s examine why you feel comfortable in each of these pieces.  Is it the feel of the material?  The shape or cut and how it looks on you?  How it fits your body and the comfort level you feel as you move in it?

What do these clothes have in common?  The visuals — color or pattern?  Maybe you tend to lean more towards neutral tones or brights, or maybe there’s a specific pattern that catches your eye.  Is it the feel of the fabric or the comfort of the fit?  Or the nostalgia?  Is it not the clothes themselves, but all the positive memories associated with them?

For the sake of this exercise, as you think about and try on each piece, try to answer the questions above — visuals, feel, and sentimental importance.

Pro tip:  Need help figuring out which clothes you actually wear the most?  Keep track of everything you wear for one week.  This includes (a) what you wear to work (unless your job requires a uniform, of course), (b) what you change into when you get home, (c) what your outfit choice is for a night out, and (d) what you wear when you run errands.  This will help you better understand what kinds of clothes you gravitate toward, and which clothes you have to force yourself to wear throughout the day because you think they should be good choices for you.  Once you have done this, you should be developing a pretty good idea of what you really like and enjoy wearing.

What are you not comfortable in?

Once you’ve established what styles make you feel comfortable, let’s move on to the rest of your closet.  Examine those pieces you keep around but don’t often wear.  (Special occasion pieces like formal dresses or workout clothes don’t count in this exercise — those have a purpose other than in your everyday wear!)  Did you originally buy these because you loved how they looked in the pics?  Or do you love the colors and pattern?  Was it an impulse buy because you just needed a black top for something?  The next question for you is… Do you not wear it because you just haven’t found the right pieces to go with it yet, or is it because you just don’t really like it? 

What do these clothes have in common?  Are they too tight or too loose?  Does the cut feel awkward?  Do they show too much skin — or not enough?  Do they make you feel stifled or exposed?  Were the colors and patterns unappealing after you brought it home and looked at it in your office or home light, or in the sunlight?

Fun fact:  Those changing room lights are meant to get you to buy!  They’re deceptive — and we are all guilty of falling for their tricks!

Try to hone in on each piece and ask yourself why, exactly, you don’t wear it.  Make note of your findings — they’ll help you later!

Pro tip:  It’s okay to admit to yourself that certain styles just aren’t you — even if you wanted them to be when you bought them.  Don’t keep these misfit clothes around as a reminder of who you’re not.  Donate them to a local thrift shop or trade them with a friend for something you’ll actually wear.  On someone else, they could look wonderful and make them happy.

What do you admire about the style of others?

By the time you’ve thoroughly gone through your closet and sorted each item into your “stay” and “go” piles, you should have a pretty good idea of what your style currently is (or at least what you prefer to wear).  Now, let’s take a look outward to those you admire… 

Taking inspiration from others is a fantastic tool for creating your style.  What fashion influencers do you follow?  What about their style draws you to them?  Is it their aesthetic?  Is it something more specific like the style lines of their clothes and the posh fabrics they wear?  Perhaps you admire their ability to rock bold choices!  Or are they imaginative and unique with their accessories? 

Granted, not everything that looks great on others will be perfect for you (and vice versa) — nothing works on everyone (not even models!) — but answering these questions will help you to understand why certain fashion choices draw your eye.

Remember, you can admire someone’s aesthetic without wanting it for yourself.  You can love the look of fishnet stockings and purple lipstick, but you can also know yourself well enough to know you wouldn’t like them on you.  And that’s okay!

Pro tip:  Websites like Pinterest are a great place to start!  Build your own board of styles that you enjoy — see what they all have in common, if anything at all.  Then, you can start incorporating some of these key pieces or accessories into your wardrobe.

Explore outside your comfort zone

Now that you’ve established your style baseline, it’s time to venture outside your comfort zone.  You know what styles you like and what fashion choices you admire, so let’s work on incorporating new looks into your wardrobe.  This is also a great time to check out our body types blog: Tips for Dressing Different Body Shapes! 

Some people can change their entire wardrobe on a dime.  They can seamlessly trade in one look for another, and it works perfectly for them!  But, if you’re like the rest of us mere mortals, you’re not going be able to pull that off so easily. 

The key here is to start slow.  Gradually incorporate new pieces into your everyday ensembles.  By pairing newer, more daring style choices with your favorite pieces, you’ll be taking baby steps each time and feeling more comfortable wearing them out.  Who knows?  Maybe the bolder style choice will turn into your new favorite look!

You’ll also want to be sure to surround yourself with a steady, reliable group of friends who are willing to hype you up whenever you wear something new — but whom you also trust to be totally honest with you if the look just isn’t working.

Try not to get too discouraged if you don’t like how some new trends look on you.  Remember, no one goes to bed a novice and wakes up a fashionista!  It’s a process for everyone, and fashion is supposed to be fun!  Experimenting is all a part of the process.

Pro Tip:  Borrow before you buy!  If you’re trying out a new trend you aren’t sure is for you, ask a friend if you can raid their closet.  Odds are, they’ll have something similar to what you’re looking for.  Or, you may even discover a new look you’d never thought to try before!  If they give their permission, borrow your new look for a day or two.  See how it feels outside your friend’s bedroom and how it feels on you!  Then, you can buy something similar for yourself!

Accessories are key

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again:  accessories are the ultimate fine tools when finessing your fashion.  When it comes to changing up your look, your accessories are the first place you should start!  Even if you’re already confident in your personal style, accessories can always help take a look to the next level.

Belts work to shape your outfit, while a cardigan or scarf can add a layer of dimension and texture.  Leather accents or combat boots can work to make your outfit more edgy, while dangly earrings or a statement necklace can add a touch of elegance.  No matter what vibe you’re going for, accessories will help you achieve it.

Plus, by using accessories, you can test different style choices without venturing too far outside your comfort zone.  For example, do you want to start incorporating more color into your wardrobe?  Start with a brightly-colored purse or scarf that you can wear with an all-black or other neutral-toned ensemble.  See which colors work best with your coloring and aesthetic, then gradually make them a more integral part of your wardrobe. 

Pro-tip:  Basic outfits always work best when trying out statement accessories.  Stick to all black or neutral tones, so you can let your new jewelry or funky colored head scarf really shine! 

Be willing to change (and be willing to try!)

Like everything else in our lives, your personal style will evolve as you do.  I mean, you don’t often see many people wearing the same styles they did when they were in high school or even college!  And that’s a good thing.  We’re supposed to grow and evolve as human beings.

Allow yourself the freedom to experiment and be open to discovering new styles and combinations you’d never thought of before.  You have to go in with a growth mindset.  Each style experiment is a chance to figure out who you are, visually.  After all, you never know what’s going to work unless you try! 

Be patient with yourself as you navigate your journey of self-discovery, and I’ll say it again:  fashion is supposed to add joy to your life!

Pro-tip:  Try to sort through your closet at least once a year.  Donate or trade the clothes you haven’t worn throughout the year, so you can always make space for new pieces!