As much as we love spending time with our friends and family, relying on other people can sometimes prohibit you from doing the things you desire. We all have busy lives, and just because you can’t find anyone to go with you to an exciting event, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t go! After all, sometimes always being surrounded by people we know and who know us can get in the way of really, deeply knowing ourselves. Spending time alone can teach you to be comfortable in your own skin, and fall in love with who you really are.
That’s why we here at Rogue Ramms are challenging you to be your own best friend and try doing these things for yourself by yourself!
Obviously, your safety should be your top priority, and you should always have the appropriate measures in place like keeping in touch with friends and family back home and even sharing your location. But don’t let fear stop you from enjoying your own company and exploring the world. You are capable of doing it on your own — and you should — even if it takes a while to work your way up to it!
“Awareness is learning to keep yourself company. And then learn to be more compassionate company, as if you were somebody you are fond of and wish to encourage.” — Geneen Roth
Visit the zoo or aquarium
Just because this is the solitude challenge, it doesn’t mean you have to be literally alone! Surround yourself with your favorite furry creatures or aquatic sea life by visiting your local zoo or aquarium.
These places can be massive, so it’s understandable if you’re not sure of what to do besides wander around. Fortunately, some zoos and aquariums have online guides to help you find the exhibits and attractions that would be most enjoyable for you.
The best part about being by yourself is — this time you can go in any order and in any direction that strikes your fancy without having to coordinate with others. You can spend the entire day seeing the animals you want to see and spending time visiting your favorites.
Aside from hanging out with the wildlife, zoos typically put on fun events or rotating exhibits for you to attend all year long! Maybe there’s a “Brew at the Zoo” adults-only event, or maybe they put on a light show every summer. Check out your local zoo for all upcoming events to help you plan the best trip possible!
Attend a concert
After two years of being concert-deprived, our favorite artists are finally able to tour again!
The last thing we want is for you to miss out on seeing your favorite songs performed live because you and your friends have conflicting schedules. Plus, going alone gives you the freedom to dance and sing out loud to your heart’s content without worrying what anyone else might think!
Music can act as a gateway to help you connect to the deepest parts of yourself. It can heal the soul and inspire the heart! Concerts can truly be a transcendent experience, if you allow yourself to completely get lost in the music and embrace the moment. It can be easier to let go and connect to these when you are alone, even alone in a crowd!
However, while this is the solitude challenge, that doesn’t mean you can’t meet people and make new friends. A lot of lasting friendships have been made at concerts. There’s just something about everyone banding (no pun intended) together, shouting well-loved lyrics at the top of their lungs. Music always has a way of bringing folks together.
Take a beach trip
Is there anything more tranquil and soothing than the sound of waves kissing the shore as you lounge in a secluded spot on a warm, sandy beach? That sounds like heaven to me!
A solo beach trip is the perfect getaway for anyone who isn’t super comfortable doing things by themselves. If you’d feel a little more secure with company the first few times you go (and the beach allows it) bring along your furbaby to enjoy the waves with you!
You can grab your favorite book and spend a relaxing afternoon by the water. Or maybe you can finally give yourself the time you need to sketch or write. If you want to bring your knitting needles to the beach, who are we to stop you? Just remember to relax and spend time with yourself!
This alone time also provides an ideal opportunity to journal, even if it isn’t something you do regularly. As you sit by yourself, see what thoughts or emotions come up. Writing is a good way to process what you’re feeling. Trust me, it can be very therapeutic!
Try a new workout class
Whether you’re an avid gym goer or looking for a new way to stay active, workout classes are a fun way to stay in shape and try something new!
If you are ready to spend some quality time with yourself, workout classes like yoga help you connect your mind, body, and soul. The movements have meaning, and the benefits extend far outside the realm of fitness. If you like a bit more fire to your workout, try Zumba, Pilates, or spin classes!
If you really want a classic, high-intensity group workout, I recommend looking for circuit training, CrossFit, or HIIT classes. Outside of the typical, there’s kickboxing, which helps you develop key self-defense skills, making you feel more powerful and strong. Maybe even try taking a pole dancing class! If you’ve been struggling with self-love lately, these classes provide the perfect opportunity for you to embrace the sexy, sultry, seductive side of yourself in a safe, non-judgmental environment. Plus, they’re a whole lot of fun!
Take a tour
Sometimes we can really take for granted all the wonderful things our city has to offer, so why not take this opportunity to be a tourist in your own town?
Take a walking tour of your city or a guided tour of your local museum. If you’re lucky, maybe you’ll even find a food tour that showcases all the local delicacies or that will send you outdoors to explore a beautiful vineyard or orchard!
While it can be so much fun exploring new places and exhibits with your friends, sometimes you just need to go by yourself. When you go it alone, you’re more open to the world around you, with fewer distractions, and the information you hear can really sink in. You may find yourself learning more than you expected about where you live, and it can give you a new appreciation for the place you call home.
Dinner and a show
This one is a timeless classic and a great go-to for when you need to mix up your self-care routine. Take yourself out on a date!
Either go to your favorite local restaurant or challenge yourself by trying someplace new. Get whatever you want on the menu. Have you been craving those macaroni bites for days, or maybe that spinach-artichoke dip is calling your name? Go for it! If you can’t finish it all, that’s okay! That’s why they have take-home boxes, right? Leftovers make for the best lunch the next day!
After dinner, take yourself to see a show!
Maybe your local theater is putting on a production of Grease! or the Mean Girls Broadway tour is rolling up to your hometown. If seeing a play or musical isn’t an option (or if you’re more a fan of films) take yourself out to the movies! There’s always a new Marvel film to see, if you’re in need of an empowering pick-me-up, or you can choose something at random. Open the theater’s website, close your eyes, and scroll, then go see whichever film your finger stops on. Be good to yourself, and enjoy the company!
Plan a solo trip
This is the final challenge, reserved for those who are really willing to push themselves out of their comfort zone! When I was studying in Europe, one of the best pieces of advice I was given was to take a solo trip, even if it was just a small one.
Traveling on your own (especially in a foreign country) can put all of your survival skills to the test, and it is so rewarding (and freeing) once you finally build up the courage to take the leap and do it!
You can start off small with just a day-trip to a city that’s a few hours away. Allow yourself to wander the streets, stopping into local cafés and boutiques that pique your interest. If you’ve aced this list, take it a step farther by spending a weekend away in another city or state!
Remember, be your own best friend.
While we are encouraging you to take yourself out, if it’s been a really hard day and you don’t have the energy to leave the house, you can easily adjust this challenge for a night in.
Just be mindful that this is you time. Put the phone away, and let your roommates know you need to be alone.
Order some take-out, snuggle up in your favorite pjs, and find something new to watch! You can browse Netflix or Hulu or (if you want to enjoy professional theater productions from your couch) the National Theatre offers a streaming service where you watch some of their most popular productions from home. You can buy the subscription for about $13 a month or pay for a single play.
I know doing things alone can be intimidating or anxiety-inducing at first, but — I promise you — it will get easier the more you do it. You are a lot stronger than you give yourself credit for — prove it to yourself — and you may be pleasantly surprised by how much you enjoy your own company!
So, this summer, take the Solitude Challenge! Try a few things on this list and come up with some on your own! Don’t forget to tag us (@Rogue.Ramms) as you share your own journey of solitude and self-awareness.